Arriving at Tank around 11pm on Saturday night, I was faced with a line over a hundred people deep and the fact that a long wait was ahead of me. In the aftermath of the Future Music Festival and the anticipation of Italian headline act Crookers, it seemed every Ksubi wearing clubber worth their weight had flocked to the alleyway behind Establishment for a piece of the action. But of course, being that I was here to review the night, there could be no time for such waiting – so I bypassed the line, along with and a number of Ken and Barbie lookalike couples were bypassed. Thankyou ITM, being a reporter definitely has its perks.
Once inside, it was easy to see why Onelove is such a popular destination on a Saturday night. Tank is an enormous, truly impressive club. Covering two large levels that includes a bar and chill-out room both upstairs and downstairs, the cavernous main room seemed to be where everybody was headed for. Now, normally a room packed with people up for a good time is all you can ask for, but when the room is too full it can lead to complications. Despite the club’s warehouse-like size, overcrowding was a notable factor throughout the evening. While plenty of punters ensured a lively atmosphere at all times, the staircase connecting the two levels was much too narrow to cope with the traffic and meant people already inside the club were asked to queue again to enter the main room. No cheeky reviewer pass for this line however.
Compounding problems were the inadequate toilet facilities downstairs, which forced people to wind their way upstairs against the crowd to use the larger bathrooms, and then be expected to join a queue to make their way back down to the dancefloor. The bars were also noticeably understaffed, however with the amount of people crammed into the place Dr Octagon could have been behind the counter and would have still struggled to cope.
All gripes aside, if you like your commercial dance the DJs clearly delivered. We entered to the cheese of a housey Delta Goodrem remix in the top bar, and whilst I shudder to write this, people seemed to be loving it. On brief wanderings into the back bar downstairs tracks like Technotronics Pump up the Jam or Daft Punk’s Celebrate could be heard, and provided a respite from the clearly overcrowded main room. Of course, it’s called the main room for a reason, and things in here got a bit mental. Grant Smilie’s set featured some very well known songs, and whilst one could have sighed at the familiarity, it was masterfully sequenced so that you couldn’t help but enjoy hearing these tracks once more. The crowd swelled and swelled, but completely ate up hits from Daft Punk, The Presets, Basement Jaxx, Robyn, and had particular praise for Stardust’s Music Sounds Better.
Crookers came on at 2 and immediately announced their presence by playing two of their most recent tracks – Knobbers and Big Money Coming . In turn they received the biggest cheers of the night, and one wonders if this was because all of a sudden the music had become a little dirtier. The top-notch lighting and sound took both of these monster tunes to another level. By the time they followed these up with a remix of Mr Ice Cream the place was really rocking. Slightly bizarre was a Will I Am sighting up by the DJ booth; I was just happy Fergie was nowhere to be seen. Here’s hoping he got his request in. Bonde de Role’s Gasolina kept things moving along and some Boys Noize tracks also worked a treat.
By the time we left at 4 there was no doubt we had witnessed a brilliant set by the Italian duo. Whether you were there to be seen, be a part of the scene, or something entirely different, Onelove was a pretty good place to do it at.
Middy1986 says...
massive line, overcrowded, hot, and i hate tank, BUT Crookers were insane.....not much will ever come close to that
patrout says...
top review! it was a fun night, despite all the posers who didnt even know who 'crookers' were.. I spent 14 hours prior to seeing crookers play, dancing at future music, but still I had the energy to completely loose my shit when they came on at 2am.. who says you need drugs to truck on? *hugs beer bottle*
dennez says...
was the best set i have ever witnessed in real life(daft punk doesnt count tho cause...well its daft punk and they are quite simply the greatest act ever)
shufflecrackers says...
Hands down the best set ive ever witnessed in a club, and only surpassed by the genius of Daft and Boys Noize.. overcrowding and the poor crowd aside- it was an amazing nite and capped off a great day after future!