Check out the photos from Missy Elliot’s bombastic Melbourne sideshow here.

Kids all over Melbourne spent Thursday dusting off those multi-coloured high tops and sourcing some bitchin’ bling in anticipation of Missy ‘Misdemeanor’ Elliott hitting our shores. Missy slipped away from the Parklife circus just long enough to play a sideshow to a bunch of devoted Melbournians, and she brought some friends with her.

From the second Missy Elliott magically appeared onstage in a smoky Gob Bluth style ‘illusion’, it was apparent this would be more than just a gig – cue the dancers dressed like glowing stick people. Everything Missy had on sparkled: her shoes were bedazzled, her mic was bedazzled. It wouldn’t surprise me if she were vagazzled under her bedazzled trackies.

Missy and her crew smashed out Gossip Folks to kick things off, complete with the side-kicks made famous in the music video. The crowd went crazy; people were hanging over every inch of balcony space in the three storey venue and the floor was absolutely packed. Missy was queen of The Palace.

Missy followed through with all the big numbers you’d expect like Work It and Ching- A Ling. Things got a little more relaxed as the sweet stink of herbal relief filled the air, but it wasn’t hard for Missy to rile things up again. Screaming, “Mil-bourn is the hottest place on the MF earth” is all it took.

It also helps when you jump into the crowd, but Missy went one better, climbing the stairs up to the first floor balcony and performing amongst the crowd with the whole ground floor looking on. Her security wasn’t too brutish so fans could get up close and personal.

Back onstage came Pass the Dutch, though people must have been psychic ‘cause that was going down way before the song started. The only downfall about the show is that it didn’t go for long enough. Missy only graced the stage for about an hour which I thought was a little shoddy, though in her defense every second of it was incredible. Also, some of her songs were only snippets, like One Minute Man, which, with a one hour limit to the show is understandable, but Missy did several covers. The Black Eyed Peas I Gotta Feeling was tolerable, but Usher’s Oh My God felt unnecessary and a little out of place.

The dancers were a huge part of the success of the show. They recreated the vibe and most of the memorable moves from Missy’s music videos and ensured the show was one big party. It wasn’t like watching most dancers who come on, purse their lips and perform a perfectly choreographed routine. These guys were just having fun shaking their shit, and no two moves were the same. They were a bunch of leg flailing, ass banging, groin grabbing dry humpers who looked to be dancing as much for each other as for the audience. Let’s just say, it was hot. If you’re seeing the show anytime soon do yourself a favour and check out the amazing styles of Charlie, a dancer with a Rihanna-style Mohawk. She does things a girl shouldn’t do in public, and she does it with a cheeky grin on her face.

Just before the close Missy took off her gleaming white sparkle encrusted Adidas Superstar Shell Toes and threw them into the crowd. “People’s always sayin, ‘Why she don’t go down in the audience?’ Well you can tell ‘em I did now.”

It all came to an end with an insanely high voltage version of Lose Control, and then Missy Elliott was gone as quickly as she appeared. Her dancers brought out a curtain that she stepped behind for just a second, and then her Houdini side took over, the curtain was dropped and she was gone.

Like the true lady she is Missy came out from backstage a moment later to sign autographs and talk to the thousands of people that still swamped the stage trying to get a piece of The MisDemeanor.