WTF?: The dance videos keeping 2012 weird

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K-Pop sensation PSY may be taking the internet by storm at the moment with his clip for Gangnam Style , but memorable as the viral sensation may be, it’s not the first mind-boggling clip of the year. In fact, we’ve thought up no fewer than seven WTF-worthy clips from the first two thirds of 2012 and gone to town with some rich psychoanalysis on the meaning behind them – BYO grain of salt. Naturally, a NSFW warning applies pretty much across the board.


Vitalic – Stamina

What happens: A series of obese men and women die: one during an exerting treadmill session, one on the toilet and one’s found floating in a canal. The cop on the case finds a mysterious drug and work out video at the homes of the deceased and being on the large side himself, decides to give it a go. He jogs after a burger floating through the air before a man in a suit with a burger for a head starts beating him up. He eventually kills the burger-head, eats some lettuce and achieves his weight loss goal. And that’s as simply as we can put it.

What it means: Through all the madness, there’s one pretty clear message to take away from the Stamina clip: fast food will kill you.

The official line: “For some tracks, I often ask myself the question, 'What kind of film would this be the soundtrack to?'" director Saman Keshavarz explained. “My answer was: A demented workout video. In short, this video is about a rather overweight detective on a case where obese people seem to be having sudden heart attacks. The only evidence found next to the bodies is a black market drug marked with an upside down triangle, and a heartbeat monitor app. Forced to reckon with these deaths, and his own weight insecurities, the detective must venture further into the rabbit hole to uncover the disturbing truth about this drug and himself." So there you go.


SebastiAn – Love in Motion

What happens: A pre-teen girl dances seductively around her bedroom in minimal attire, whipping a feather-boa, purring to the camera and crawling on all fours while a young boy films her on a handy-cam. It’s as uncomfortable as it sounds.

What it means: The clip was directed by the infamous Gaspar Noé, the man behind the notoriously disturbing 2002 film Irreversible as well as a clip for Placebo that was never released as it was deemed too sexually explicit. So is this a satire (or critique) on the sexualisation of children, or is it making a point about our own perversion for seeing something suss there at all?

The official line: According to Lente Tresor, the 12-year-old actress in the clip, it’s all a lot of fuss about nothing. “For all of the people making any negative remarks, the story arc is about a little girl dancing on music playing dress up, acting silly while her 'brother' shoots her on a cam,” she defended on YouTube. We’re sure Gaspar Noé had more in mind than that, but he’s remained closed-lipped on the video.


Destructo – Technology

What happens: Guy finds out his girlfriend is a robot, gets really pissed off and starts being a massive dick about it, bringing another girl home for some borderline BDSM infidelity. The robot tells her owner she loves him, to which he responds by stuffing newspaper in her mouth, wrapping her up in plastic and taking her back to the factory with a ‘defective’ note slapped on.

What it means: The lyrics say it loud and clear: “We have the technology”. So the moral here, then, is to be wary of what advances in technology can provide and that even the best engineered products are no substitute for human emotion. Or maybe it’s a comment on the objectification of women and suggestion that they’re only worth keeping around as long as they can serve as emotionless sexual objects. Deep, right.

The official line: Destructo didn’t see things quite so richly. “Basically there’s a girl named Agatta who does all our editing for the HARD videos and when she heard the song she had this crazy idea that involved real dolls and all this crazy stuff I wasn’t even aware of,” he explained after the video was released. “So I thought it’s a crazy idea, sounds cool, let’s go for it.”

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