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Faith
Taken from here.

Quote:

Originally Posted by If you're feeling down, here is a picture of a shaved llama


TAKE TIME TO READ. It's worth reading it. Trust me



Professor : You are a Christian, aren’t you, son ?

Student : Yes, sir.

Professor: So, you believe in GOD ?

Student : Absolutely, sir.

Professor : Is GOD good ?

Student : Sure.

Professor: Is GOD all powerful ?

Student : Yes.

Professor: My brother died of cancer even though he prayed to GOD to heal him. Most of us would attempt to help others who are ill. But GOD didn’t. How is this GOD good then? Hmm?

(Student was silent.)

Professor: You can’t answer, can you ? Let’s start again, young fella. Is GOD good?

Student : Yes.

Professor: Is satan good ?

Student : No.

Professor: Where does satan come from ?

Student : From … GOD …

Professor: That’s right. Tell me son, is there evil in this world?

Student : Yes.

Professor: Evil is everywhere, isn’t it ? And GOD did make everything. Correct?

Student : Yes.

Professor: So who created evil ?

(Student did not answer.)

Professor: Is there sickness? Immorality? Hatred? Ugliness? All these terrible things exist in the world, don’t they?

Student : Yes, sir.

Professor: So, who created them ?

(Student had no answer.)

Professor: Science says you have 5 Senses you use to identify and observe the world around you. Tell me, son, have you ever seen GOD?

Student : No, sir.

Professor: Tell us if you have ever heard your GOD?

Student : No , sir.

Professor: Have you ever felt your GOD, tasted your GOD, smelt your GOD? Have you ever had any sensory perception of GOD for that matter?

Student : No, sir. I’m afraid I haven’t.

Professor: Yet you still believe in Him?

Student : Yes.

Professor : According to Empirical, Testable, Demonstrable Protocol, Science says your GOD doesn’t exist. What do you say to that, son?

Student : Nothing. I only have my faith.

Professor: Yes, faith. And that is the problem Science has.

Student : Professor, is there such a thing as heat?

Professor: Yes.

Student : And is there such a thing as cold?

Professor: Yes.

Student : No, sir. There isn’t.

(The lecture theater became very quiet with this turn of events.)

Student : Sir, you can have lots of heat, even more heat, superheat, mega heat, white heat, a little heat or no heat. But we don’t have anything called cold. We can hit 458 degrees below zero which is no heat, but we can’t go any further after that. There is no such thing as cold. Cold is only a word we use to describe the absence of heat. We cannot measure cold. Heat is energy. Cold is not the opposite of heat, sir, just the absence of it.

(There was pin-drop silence in the lecture theater.)

Student : What about darkness, Professor? Is there such a thing as darkness?

Professor: Yes. What is night if there isn’t darkness?

Student : You’re wrong again, sir. Darkness is the absence of something. You can have low light, normal light, bright light, flashing light. But if you have no light constantly, you have nothing and its called darkness, isn’t it? In reality, darkness isn’t. If it is, well you would be able to make darkness darker, wouldn’t you?

Professor: So what is the point you are making, young man ?

Student : Sir, my point is your philosophical premise is flawed.

Professor: Flawed ? Can you explain how?

Student : Sir, you are working on the premise of duality. You argue there is life and then there is death, a good GOD and a bad GOD. You are viewing the concept of GOD as something finite, something we can measure. Sir, Science can’t even explain a thought. It uses electricity and magnetism, but has never seen, much less fully understood either one. To view death as the opposite of life is to be ignorant of the fact that death cannot exist as a substantive thing.

Death is not the opposite of life: just the absence of it. Now tell me, Professor, do you teach your students that they evolved from a monkey?

Professor: If you are referring to the natural evolutionary process, yes, of course, I do.

Student : Have you ever observed evolution with your own eyes, sir?

(The Professor shook his head with a smile, beginning to realize where the argument was going.)

Student : Since no one has ever observed the process of evolution at work and cannot even prove that this process is an on-going endeavor. Are you not teaching your opinion, sir? Are you not a scientist but a preacher?

(The class was in uproar.)

Student : Is there anyone in the class who has ever seen the Professor’s brain?

(The class broke out into laughter. )

Student : Is there anyone here who has ever heard the Professor’s brain, felt it, touched or smelt it? No one appears to have done so. So, according to the established Rules of Empirical, Stable, Demonstrable Protocol, Science says that you have no brain, sir. With all due respect, sir, how do we then trust your lectures, sir?

(The room was silent. The Professor stared at the student, his face unfathomable.)

Professor: I guess you’ll have to take them on faith, son.

Student : That is it sir … Exactly ! The link between man & GOD is FAITH. That is all that keeps things alive and moving.

P.S.

I believe you have enjoyed the conversation. And if so, you’ll probably want your friends / colleagues to enjoy the same, won’t you?

Forward this to increase their knowledge … or FAITH.

By the way, that student was EINSTEIN.

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No, the student wasn't Einstein. And that's one fucking dumb Professor. And yes, you can observe evolution occurring if you're not a complete and utter moron.


Fuck you for putting bullshit forwarded emails into threads. Especially shitty fundie crap.

http://i.imgur.com/n1ndf.png
Thanks for coming over, guys....thanks for breaking my lamp

Last edited by Fangoriously: 19-Apr-12 at 10:27am

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I had faith that video or an image thereof would appear within the first 10 posts
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Quote:

Originally Posted by Fangoriously View Post

No, the student wasn't Einstein. And that's one fucking dumb Professor. And yes, you can observe evolution occurring if you're not a complete and utter moron.


Fuck you for putting bullshit forwarded emails into threads. Especially shitty fundie crap.

http://i.imgur.com/n1ndf.png

+100

This rubbish was more fictional than the bible.
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Quote:

Originally Posted by psyv

TAKE TIME TO READ. It's worth reading it. Trust me

yep, you know those situations when someone asks you to trust them and you think to yourself 'yeah right, this should be good'

this would be one of those situations
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Quote:

Originally Posted by Fangoriously View Post

No, the student wasn't Einstein. And that's one fucking dumb Professor. And yes, you can observe evolution occurring if you're not a complete and utter moron.


Fuck you for putting bullshit forwarded emails into threads. Especially shitty fundie crap.

http://i.imgur.com/n1ndf.png

lolololol get more angry! Every post of yours sounds like that guy from Strongbad...

I know right @ Larrisa
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Someone linked this on facebook yesterday, what a crock of shit. There's so many inaccuracies in that it's actually depressing. I die a little inside every time I see just how stupid and uneducated people can be.
m_xt +

For a moment, nothing happened. Then, after a second or so, nothing continued to happen.

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Hitler and Stalin were both Atheists and look at how much damage they caused! Think about it.
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Originally Posted by Spin-A-Disc Jr
I was doing a disco at my old primary school and the amp blew up halfway thru the disco and 2 kids who were right near the stage got burnt by the sparks thrown from the amp.

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Except that Hitler wasn't an atheist, huuuurrrrrrrrr derp
m_xt +

For a moment, nothing happened. Then, after a second or so, nothing continued to happen.

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Quote:

Originally Posted by Fledz View Post

Except that Hitler wasn't an atheist, huuuurrrrrrrrr derp

Yes, that is the point I was making. I even saw Pell use this same argument on QandA against Dawkins the other week.
Check it ****s.
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Quote:

Originally Posted by Spin-A-Disc Jr
I was doing a disco at my old primary school and the amp blew up halfway thru the disco and 2 kids who were right near the stage got burnt by the sparks thrown from the amp.

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That professor got badly pwned
Wats clubing by yourself like and dose enyone do it
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Quote:

Originally Posted by m_xt View Post

Yes, that is the point I was making. I even saw Pell use this same argument on QandA against Dawkins the other week.

Oh my bad. I can't keep track of who is and isn't a nutter around here
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Everybody reading the OP, thinking that it's actually legitimate, got owned.
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Quote:

Originally Posted by b_bop View Post

That professor got badly pwned

no.
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Quote:

Originally Posted by b_bop View Post

That professor got badly pwned

Not really, because he didn't exist... that's sub-1st year philosophy level argument, no way that actually happened, it's a made up story by god-botherers... kinda like the bible really.
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If there is no God then what is point of life? Bet you science can't explain that.
Check it ****s.
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Quote:

Originally Posted by Spin-A-Disc Jr
I was doing a disco at my old primary school and the amp blew up halfway thru the disco and 2 kids who were right near the stage got burnt by the sparks thrown from the amp.

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Quote:

Originally Posted by SpaceMonkey View Post

Not really, because he didn't exist... that's sub-1st year philosophy level argument, no way that actually happened, it's a made up story by god-botherers... kinda like the bible really.

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Quote:

Originally Posted by m_xt View Post

If there is no God then what is point of life? Bet you science can't explain that.

The point of life.... is not asking retarded unanswerable questions.
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Quote:

Originally Posted by m_xt View Post

If there is no God then what is point of life?.

To fuck. a lot. :thrust:
Never be a spectator of unfairness or stupidity. Seek out argument and disputation for their own sake; the grave will supply plenty of time for silence
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Quote:

Originally Posted by m_xt View Post

If there is no God then what is point of life? Bet you science can't explain that.

I bet it can...


Also, come out of the woodwork moar poodles!

Bahahaha yes SpaceMonkey, yes.

@ Claire and Mick: this one's for you...

http://instagr.am/p/JiaOcHkpxV/

Last edited by psyv: 20-Apr-12 at 05:28am

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m_xt +

For a moment, nothing happened. Then, after a second or so, nothing continued to happen.

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Quote:

Originally Posted by psyv View Post

I bet it can...

But it can't, but that isn't the point of science hence my comment parodying some religous folks misunderstanding of the purpose of science.
Check it ****s.
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Quote:

Originally Posted by Spin-A-Disc Jr
I was doing a disco at my old primary school and the amp blew up halfway thru the disco and 2 kids who were right near the stage got burnt by the sparks thrown from the amp.

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Is the answer to life the universe and everything, but what is the question?

End of story - The universe is fundamentally flawed.

42 truly is the answer to everything.
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Quote:

Originally Posted by grug72 View Post

Is the answer to life the universe and everything, but what is the question?

End of story - The universe is fundamentally flawed.

42 truly is the answer to everything.

What is 7 x 6?


Also God's final message to creation "We apologise for the inconvenience"
Check it ****s.
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Quote:

Originally Posted by Spin-A-Disc Jr
I was doing a disco at my old primary school and the amp blew up halfway thru the disco and 2 kids who were right near the stage got burnt by the sparks thrown from the amp.

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Quote:

Originally Posted by m_xt View Post

What is 7 x 6?


Also God's final message to creation "We apologise for the inconvenience"

Hahahaha,

Wasn't it

9 * 6?

Because Earth got destroyed and it put out the calculation which Arthur was the final link to? Anyway if you knew both the answer and the question the universe would collapse and turn into something even more bizarre. That is my understanding.

To quote Marvin

"Here I am, brain the size of a planet and they ask me to take you down to the bridge. Call that job satisfaction? 'Cos I don't." not related at all, just a good quote
m_xt +

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Quote:

Originally Posted by grug72 View Post

Anyway if you knew both the answer and the question the universe would collapse and turn into something even more bizarre. That is my understanding.

Some believe this may have already happened.

Thread now about Hitchhikers Guide

The Final Proof of the non-Existence of God was proved by a Babel Fish.
Now, it is such a bizarrely improbable coincidence that anything so mind-bogglingly useful could have evolved purely by chance that some have chosen to see it as the final proof of the NON-existence of God. The argument goes something like this:

"I refuse to prove that I exist," says God, "for proof denies faith, and without faith I am nothing."

"But," says Man, "the Babel fish is a dead giveaway, isn't it? It could not have evolved by chance. It proves that You exist, and so therefore, by Your own arguments, You don't. QED"

"Oh dear," says God, "I hadn't thought of that," and promptly vanishes in a puff of logic.

"Oh, that was easy," says Man, and for an encore goes on to prove that black is white and gets himself killed on the next zebra crossing.
Check it ****s.
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Quote:

Originally Posted by Spin-A-Disc Jr
I was doing a disco at my old primary school and the amp blew up halfway thru the disco and 2 kids who were right near the stage got burnt by the sparks thrown from the amp.

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Wicked. Now what happened to all the dolphins???
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Quote:

Originally Posted by psyv View Post

Wicked. Now what happened to all the dolphins???

So long, and thanks for all the fish.

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Originally Posted by jdoodle View Post

not liking yoda is like knocking back a root when presented nude in a YD change room

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^mmmm all this talk of meat is getting me excited.

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Originally Posted by pEAkeR_hAT View Post

Any sex enthusiast should whore it up at least once in their life IMO,
Its the oldest profession in the world.
Are you calling everyone wrong?.

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Deserves a re-post

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Originally Posted by B_e_de View Post

It's the same as going out on a busy street and looking at the people around you, most of them are fgts.

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my discman had electronic shock protection. not something i'd look for in a chick, even after you slap her she'd keep on bitching for 30 seconds

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Thread turned out better than expected. Hitch hiker's Guide owns!
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O Mick you are so cool
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Let's hug me


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Thread perhaps needed a Faith No More song for some counter balancing of the arguement.
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Shit thread.
Shit argument.
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Quote:

Originally Posted by m_xt View Post

What is 7 x 6?


Also God's final message to creation "We apologise for the inconvenience"

It's not what is 7 x 6 - the question that they ask is 'what is 6 x 9 - 42'

The whole point is that the answer is wrong - that's why the universe feels 'off' all the time.

Edit: Huh, beaten.
Thanks for coming over, guys....thanks for breaking my lamp

Last edited by Fangoriously: 30-Apr-12 at 08:09am

Reason: Already been posted

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Quote:

Originally Posted by psyv View Post

Wicked. Now what happened to all the dolphins???

Those bastards flew off this planet thats what happened.


the answer is 42!
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why can't people accept that the universe is too large and complex for our tiny minds to comprehend. Who says there has to be a point to life?....too many people think that our lives matter and we have this journey/purpose but in the scheme of things we're all random dots inside something much bigger.
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Einstein was a Pantheist. End thread.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Spicy View Post

life and shit.

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