It’s that time of year again when the folks at Ministry come to take you by the hand and lead you into the future of commercial club-land. Sometimes I worry that by reviewing Ministry of Sound releases I’m undermining my journalistic credibility. But then I remember that I’ve got a way too high opinion of myself and that no one really cares about my credibility.

The more Ministry releases I review, the harder it seems to be to write anything original. Maybe I’m just lacking in the imagination department, but there’s only so many times you can use the phrases ‘big-room house’, ‘mainstream sounds’, ‘upfront club hits’, ‘epic tunes’ and ‘massive anthems’ before they become the linguistic equivalent of someone stabbing a hot fork in your eyes. So, in the interests of keeping things fresh, I’m going to attempt to make it through this review without resorting to lazy clichés.

The ever-reliable Goodwill is responsible for disc one, and it’s a bloody awesome mix of big-room house, epic tunes and massive anthems… no, it’s impossible not to use them, clichés are here to stay. There’s instant lift-off with Tim Berg’s euphoric Seek Bromance and Roger Sanchez’s 2Gether. Those of you paying attention will remember that these appeared on Sanchez’s Release Yourself compilation from mid-last year.

Armand Van Helden is enjoying something of a creative purple patch at the moment, and he maintains this with a funky little remix of Bag Raiders’ Sunlight. Eric Prydz proves he can still knock out the tunes with the glowing The Reason, although unfortunately it clocks in here at less than two minutes before making way for the utter garbage of the Swedish House Mafia’s Miami 2 Ibiza. Surely the talent in that collective can come up with better?

Tracks from Sam La More, Sarah McLeod and The Aston Shuffle maintain the quota of local talent, McLeod’s transformation from rock chick to dance diva being one of the more surprising reinventions of recent times. iiO’s Rapture is such a classic that messing with it is risky business, and it seems a little bizarre that former vocalist Nadia Ali would feel the need to re-work it, but she pulls it off, adding some new vocal lines and converting the original into a track that stands up in its own right.

I never thought I’d see the day where I mentioned US alt-rockers Switchfoot in a dance music review, but with the inclusion of Max Vangeli’s surging house remix of Always, that day has arrived. There’s a little bit of soul rippling through Christian Marchi’s I Got You, and there’s plenty of filtered fun to be had with Avicii’s Malo. Mason’s Runaway takes the gimmicky galloping disco of Eruption’s 1980 cover of the Del Shannon classic and gives it a contemporary sheen, although it’s not much more than a tacky novelty.

The disco vibe continues with the smooth grooves of Aniki’s fantastically titled Lesbian Bondage Fiasco. Goodwill’s collaboration with Mark Brown’s MYNC on Special Brew recalls some of the finer moments of French house, with all its loops and repetition, and should be dominating dancefloors for months. I wonder if it’s named after that British beer that gets you smashed after one can.

The mix draws to a close with a few gems, specifically Ridney’s moody and a little bit trancey Arrivals, Russ Chimes’ funky vocal cut Targa, and best of all, Those Usual Suspects’ Together, which glistens with an uplifting melodic sensibility that’ll see it close a few sets.

I probably just devoted way too many words there to describing the one disc, but it’s a great mix, so that’s my justification for taking up your precious time, dear reader. The second disc sees Tom Piper knit together loads of electro-based material, and while the whole thing doesn’t really do it for me, I’m sure you’ll find something to enjoy if you revel in the more bleepy, glitchy, electro kind of stuff.

The promo blurb uses the term ‘underground’ in reference to this disc, but that needs to be taken in the context of Ministry of Sound. Tracks from Wolfgang Gartner, Grafton Primary, Tiga, Deadmau5 and Ou Est Le Swimming Pool prop up the first part of the mix, so it’s not like there’s an absence of big names.

The mix really hits its stride with Laidback Luke’s widescreen electro-house effort Timebomb, which powers along with a surging intensity, and this is followed by Martin Solveig’s current smash Hello, which gets a pretty brutal electro overhaul courtesy of Sidney Samson. Yeah from Boys Noize is a highlight, and it’s one of those simple-yet-effective kind of tracks, with its hooky vocal line and uplifting chord progression. Digitalism’s Blitz brings some funk to the game, while Pendulum’s The Island closes the mix in fine fashion.

So all up, if you’re a lover of all things MoS, then this release will have you dancing in the streets. If you’re not, then it will probably have you running for cover.

But hey, everyone needs to cut loose and embrace some brash commercialism from time to time. My vote goes to Goodwill’s mix, although that’s not to say Tom Piper’s mix doesn’t have its moments as well, and what’s even better is The Bum Song is nowhere to be seen.

Ministry of Sound Clubbers Guide To 2011 is out now on Ministry Of Sound.